The good news is that I'm not related to any Alsations, the bad news is that I think my tv addiction is getting worse.  I'm still in Olympic training mode too . . .

Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce !
Andy Murray's still a great British player . . .

Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce !
Mario Ballotelli - what a guy . . .

Bounce, bounce, bounce !
Rafa Nadal - oops . . .

Bounce-bounce !
Bob Diamond, what an arse . . .

Bounce !
Simon Gotobed, too much bouncing & definitely too much goggle-boxing - I'm not even a sporty type of fella !?
Have a brill weekend,  xx.

I'm in training for the British Olympics Team, London 2012 - you've probably heard a bit about it on the snooze . . .

'Bouncing for England' is an Olympic event I assume ?  It's certainly my best event, apart from scoffing perhaps, but that's not really a sport, just pure enjoyment.  I can bounce with the best of them I reckon, although if it's hot I do tend to get a bit hot & itchy . . . anyway, more practice again today.
My only real concern is if I create a trans-gender debate ! - I had my balls removed at an early age - it could get really embarrassing, but I hope not, I really want to represent my country . . .

Simon Gotobed,  Gold Medal Prospect,  Mens/Womens Bouncing Event,  London 2012,  xx.

We watched Wimbledon on the goggle-box for a bit last night - Brit Andy Murray beat some old fella pretty easily, 'short & sweet' said Pa.  I reckon Pa could have given the old fella a good game if I'm being honest - but I'm no expert . . . still, a great start for Mr Murray.

A quiet snooze day today, if I can be bothered I might pop next door later and shake paws with their cat, just to be topical, it's been a long time now . . .

Have fun,  Simon Gotobed,  Old English fella,  xx.

The sun is shining here today & I'm feeling much brighter Thanks!

Footy season has finished and Wimbledon has started, hurrah!  Andy Murray plays today . . . Good Luck! (he's going to need lots of it).

If he loses early he may be in trouble, no doubt the tabloid press will be looking into his tax arrangements for their next story . . .

Simon Gotobed,  Old English & British today,  xx.

Ok, let's just admit it - it was an awful weekend.

Pa buggered off on Friday, it rained, Cliff Richard missed Hackney, it rained, Lewis Hamilton crashed, it rained, Pa got home Sunday teatime, still raining, and England lost on penalties . . .

The good news is that it's Monday !!!

And I might might not be 100% Old English - I may have a German ancestry . . . I can't say anymore until I've traced my family tree, I'll let you know Thursday or Sunday . . .

Pa's bogging off for the weekend - just bloody wonderful - I'm being packed off to Barkingham Palace !!

The food's basic, the rooms are sparse, the company's usually crap and there's no goggle-box . . .

Just soddin' great, can't not wait for the weekend.

And it's raining.

Have a great day,  Simon G,  xx.

I always knew we'd qualify for the knockout-stage, it was never in doubt, I don't know why u were even worried - group winners!?

Italy next, probably then Germany and then maybe Spain in the final - a piece of cake !

Simon Gotobed,  Old English fella getting ahead of himself . . . xx.

P.S;  Accurate prediction - media interest will intensify, expectation levels will rise - I almost sound like I know what I'm talking about (but I don't!) . . .

In-ger-Land,  In-ger-Land,  In ger Land !!

So excited & so nervous all at once - probably like your Wedding day, not that I'll ever know . . .

IN -GER-LAND !

Enjoy the game if u can,  Simon Gotobed, Jumping on the Bandwagon,  xx.

I'm in the Doghouse - again - but I really shouldn't be. . .

I noticed the two steaks as Pa put them in the fridge - he shouldn't have let me sniff them on their way through the kitchen.  He really ought to have a more secure fridge - a swift left paw stroke and it opens like magic, that's surely a manufacturing fault?!

The only mistake I really made was scoffing them too quick, then being sick on my blanket!
I spent last night in the garage with dry biscuits and water, no tv.

It rained anyway and the barbecue was cancelled so I don't know what all the fuss was about.

Simon Gotobed,  Today's another Day,  Keep smiling I say,  xx.

Apparently we might now win Euro 2012 !

As I may have said before, I'm no expert pundit . . .

Have a brill English weekend - windy, sunshine & showers - I am an expert on the weather !

Simon Gotobed,  still v. proud to be Old English,  xx.

Can't wait for tonight, I'm off out with Pa, he's driving.  Beers, burgers and footy, just bloody lovely!

I hope he doesn't get too excited, there's no way I'm driving him home . . .

My prediction - England to win 1-0.  Downing to score.

By the way, I know nothing about football so don't put money on the above, I will not be held responsible for any betting irregularities ! ?

Simon Gotobed,  Old English fella,  xx.

I think I'd like to live in the USA and then I could probably get a job . . .

Apparently Police Dogs in the states have their own Police officer number and badge !  They have the same rights as u humanoids - I heard this on the radio yesterday, how bloody brilliant!

I can see myself as a cop, maybe like Columbo (but without the rain-mac), or Dirty Harry, maybe not Kojak though - I'm far too hairy.  If I had a partner I think I'd be more Starsky than Hutch.
Just a thought . . .

Is cheese & onion quiche a good or a bad idea for breakfast???

Simon Gotobed, Potential Law Enforcement Officer;  maybe one day,  xx.

I live in The Midlands, the East Midlands I think - I'm not a geography student, but I do watch the weather forecasts, a lot!

Thankfully I don't live in the south-west, the south-east, Wales, the north-west, the north-east, Scotland or Syria.  I think that pretty much covers it - I'm just very lucky it seems - and glad to be alive. . .

I'm off for a Snooze and weather update if I can find the tv remote;  have a brill day,  xx.

P.S;  If u live in Greece, Spain, Portugal, Ireland, Cyprus or Italy don't bother going to the Bank today, just hide your Euros under your bed . . .

Ok so it wasn't that wonderful, maybe not inspiring, possibly not the beautiful game, but a point is a point apparently!  Looking forward to Friday already.

Got a busy day today, need to plan the Ark as Pa the lazy arse never managed to build his . . .
Might have a kip first though - have a great day!

Remember to be proud Old English like me ! ?   xx.

Excited ? ?  Yeah, me too - really excited in fact, can't bloody wait for 5pm !

England v France, kick off 5pm - be proud, be optimistic for now, be realistic later perhaps . . .

Be like me, just enjoy it if we can, be Old English.

Simon Gotobed,  has a friend who really is a British Bulldog (his name is Wayne!?),  xx.

Motorways are amazing!

I went out with Pa last night down the M1, I unfortunately had an appointment at the surgery due to my dicky tummy (u really don't want the details - a messy business).  He drives his Audi at Clarkson-speed most of the time - even last night when the weather was awful - it was 'raining cats & dogs' as u humanoids might say !
I'm sure he was in full control of course, but u just never know do u - even when your best friend is driving . . .

But guess what?  The signs on the motorway were showing concern for me!  I'm always put on a blanket in the back, just to be on the safe side, but how did they know how I was feeling last night?  They illuminated high above the road, for all to see, SKID RISK . . .

Isn't technology amazing, telepathetic even . . . Simon Gotobed, Living on the Edge,  xx.

Why didn't u tell me?  Why didn't anyone mention it?  Is it really starting tomorrow?  Euro 2012 Footy !!

Have Old English sent a team to God knows where ?  Why aren't Brazil in it - didn't they qualify?

I'm so confused, as per usual.  I'm off for a kip, I think I need to re-charge my batteries (another crazy humanoid phrase I seem to have picked up!).

Have a great day,  Simon Gotobed, definitely Old English, not British, or Scottish . . .

Wow !  What a weekend that was !  I'm knackered - so much eating, drinking, dancing & flag-waving . . . I was exhausted just watching on the goggle-box - I never left the house all weekend - Jubilee hypnotism in HD.

Pa did consider spraying me red, white and blue but I think he thought better of it when he realized he'd be the one having to bath me later . . .

Proud to be Old English,  Simon Gotobed,  xx.

Pa and I have got a really, really busy weekend ahead.

The Queen and her grumpy old geezer are coming round for tea tonight - Pa probably won't be bothered to cook so I'm guessing fish 'n chips as it's Friday.  If he decides to splash out it might be Indian takeaway, but I'm not too sure if they like Indian . . .

Tomorrow night Pa's out on the lash with Harry - it could be a late one I reckon, it could get messy I suspect . . . I'm staying in and keeping a low profile.

On Sunday we're going out with William and his gorgeous young wife, I think a picnic is likely but it apparently depends on the weather - I think we all really ought to eat something, especially Kate.  If it rains we might end up at KFC, but we'll see . . .

On Monday the Queen's got a busy day I'm told so I'm dog-sitting the Corgis' !  Just my bloody luck, a pack of rowdy little fellas - just bloody great, Thanks!

This is what Pa's got planned, I was just hoping for a quiet Jubilee weekend, but hey - go with the flow I say . . .
Have a good one,  Simon Gotobed, Royal Correspondent, xx.